So tired

...but I need to work past it. 

This has been a large deterrent to most of what I do. Heck I passed out on Ricky last night at like 10 pm. I just kept falling asleep while watching Face Off. Maybe it's my body telling me that I'm not particularly interested in that activity as I seemed to have no issue staying up to watch American Horror. 

Looks like I'll be staying in my current job. I can't say I'm heart broken. We need the money (as has been shown by the $400 car repair we just paid for.)

I did put together a schedule however, as much as I feel I need it, I feel like I don't want to be too structured either. I really think I'll just look into housekeeping services after we get all this debt paid off. That is what bugs me mostly. And what I need help with. If I can just get that under control, I'd feel so much better. 

Ridiculous!

Is everything at the moment! 

I need to find a way to make these reports run faster when the server is slow. I need to figure out what I want in life. And I need to figure out what my goals are. Considering my father, perhaps I should make these 5 year goals. That might be a good idea....

1. Finish my web hosting report, my tab report, and FOS report. 
2. Assist BH with automating. 
3. Talk to Ricky about 5 year plan. 
4. Figure out a way to do shopping and cooking. 

Time to reframe

...and work smarter, not harder. 

So the question is, how could I improve some tasks I have today?

- I need to use my fill table code to run the email stuff. 
- Also need to look at ways to make my split code quicker for past runs

Not much beyond that. Just a simple waiting game. 

I suppose I need to start thinking of ways to beef up my game on 1:1s as well. Perhaps mark a project that can really shine for the week?

Ugh, I'm so out of it. This damn cold/allergies.

How am I going to accomplish everything?

Well...I managed to hold on to my job...for now.

So I guess I need to question if I want to keep it. Hmmm...

Well, I imagine at least for another few months until I can pay our bills off. Anyway, the real question is how to get my life back again. I was posed the question of, "If you could explain 2013 in one word...one word to describe what you want to achieve....what would it be?"

I decided my word would be "Enjoy." I don't enjoy anything like I used to...sleep, showering, exercising, dating, chilling, existing.

I have so many goals but I always fail to make time for those things I just enjoy. Who knew that being a parent would be so overwhelming..anyway...

Things I'd like to figure out how to do...

1. Read a book
2. Exercise
3. Cook
4. Watch a movie without interuption
5. Draw a cartoon
6. Spend some couples time with Ricky

Some New Years Resolutions

1.  Plan out my menu
2. Take Ridley out more often
3. Drink more water
4. Take a statistics class
5. Relax more

I'm gonna go relax now.