I was reading someone's explanation of my blog and it reminded me of all the occurances recently where I've pined for kids.
There's just too much going on right now, but I think soon I'd like to go in and get tested. I can't say as the dead goldfish helped my self-esteem in this area though. Even hubby was joking about it. That morning I bemoaned the fact that if we couldn't take care of a goldfish, how could we take care of a kid?
Anyway, the frustrating part is being around town. We'll see a family together. I just look at them and wonder, "Do they realize how lucky they are?" Of course, the logical part of me also says, "You never know. They could have had difficulty conceiving that child and DO realize how fortunate they are."
But then I see the teenage moms and knowing they are probably stressed out and unhappy I wonder, "Will they realize how fortunate they are? Will we ever get that chance to be so fortunate?"
I imagine what it would be like to be them. Right there. Just hubby and I and are sweet little one. Maybe eating breakfast out. Little Jordan or Robert coloring franticly on their little kids menu, while we try to catch the juice drink balanced precariously on the table edge.
The other night there was a mom with her two kids swimming in the pool at a hotel we went to for a shindig. The kids were giggling and jumping around. The mom was very caring and cautious.
Some days I just wonder. Is it destined to be?
1 comment:
I feel the same way sometimes; it seems as if I see kids everywhere and I’m the only one that can’t seem to have them.
Don’t let the goldfish loss get you too down--from what I’ve heard, kids will definitely let you know when they need something or are not feeling well.
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